I love stories that end with happily ever afters, but sometimes, what is true for your characters and what serves your story best is the breaking down of a love story.

And a love ending can be just as powerful as those romances coming to fruition.

When writing character-driven fiction, our protagonist’s arc can be heavily influenced by romance. 

Breakups and unrequited love provide emotional depth and authentic growth for your MC.

Discovering one’s strength or independence through lost love is no different than through the hero’s journey. The ingredients necessary for character development are still there.

In today’s post, I’ll share a three-step process to utilize a romantic breakup as a key feature in your protagonist’s internal journey, ensuring it remains character-driven and authentic throughout the plot.

We’re diving right into the breaking of a love story. 

If you need help with building a romantic relationship in the beginning, check out this blog post on 4 Moments to Write in Your Plot for Authentic Romantic Relationships.

Whether your characters will be breaking up and then reuniting or completely separating by the end of the story, you’ll need to foreshadow the breakup by hinting that not all is well far in advance.

How can you do this?

Explore some of these causes of a breakup and choose what makes sense for your characters’ relationship:

• Do they have misaligned goals? (career, family vision, etc.)
• Does one character’s growth outpace the other’s? (Consider whether your MC is no longer the same person by the end, while their significant other has not matured or evolved to match their new perspective on life)
• Is there an unforgivable betrayal?
• Does the protagonist lose trust in their romantic partner?

Consider how missed timing, miscommunication and subtle behaviour will play a role in this eventual breakup.

Show your protagonist’s romance slowly unravelling.

Perhaps, they try to hold on too tightly even as they sense that the relationship is over.

Putting up blinders and lying to oneself until they can’t anymore is one way that your protagonist might hold on to a relationship before the breakup.

Events that bring clarity in hindsight can allow your MC to realize that the breakup is for the best.

To figure out your pacing, craft a timeline of the key events in their relationship.

Ensure that there is plenty of breathing room between the cracks and the ultimate breakup by sprinkling in additional proof that their relationship isn’t working.

Whether your protagonist’s heart is broken or they are the one doing the breaking up, the end of a relationship should take an emotional toll on the characters. 

Part of this will occur during the “cracking” phase. Your character might feel betrayed, frustrated, or hopeless. They might second-guess everything that is said and done, or try to ignore any signs of dissonance.

And after they break up, your MC probably needs time to grieve.

Each protagonist’s means of coping and healing will look different based on their backstory and personality. So, make sure you know what your character would and wouldn’t do.

Is your character someone who would…

• Take risks to avoid feelings of discomfort?
• Isolate from family and friends?
• Seek revenge against the significant other who hurt them?

Their reaction is a part of their character arc and can often lead to the revelation that forces them to revise their beliefs about themselves and the world around them.

Your readers want to see your character struggling. They want to witness them heal from this romantic fallout.

How can you demonstrate this emotional journey?

Consider:

• Using dialogue sparingly to reveal their inner distress ( remember: sometimes what a character doesn’t say is just as revealing. Subverting what they truly mean can hint at where they are along their healing journey).
• Demonstrating your character’s behavioural changes during the immediate aftermath of a break-up (when I’m sad, I lose my appetite. Some might hide behind their work, overfilling their schedule to avoid dealing with their current pain).
• Using present moments to revisit events during the relationship through flashbacks and memories (at first, they might be confused or angry. Later on, these scenes could be the catalyst for their internal transformation, the reflective process that sparks true understanding).

Your story needs both internal and external conflict post-breakup. This is the point at which your protagonist’s romantic plot and their character arc align.

If the romance in your book is there to serve your character’s journey (and it should be), then you’ll need to demonstrate how it has influenced their transformation.

For most of us, our protagonist will take one of two avenues:

1. Finalize the break up: if there were moments of ‘will they/ won’t they’ throughout the story, this is the time where your MC accepts that the break up is real. They will not be getting back together.
2. Reconciliation: This post is about writing realistic breakups, but sometimes, the breakup is a key plot point in the middle of the story, while your characters will reunite in the end.

How do you know which avenue to take?

Ask yourself these questions:

• Have your characters both evolved? 
• Are their goals/ beliefs now aligned?
• Can the protagonist realistically forgive without lingering resentment or distrust?

With both avenues, you’ll need to consider if emotional wounds will be left open (possibly foreshadowing future tensions, especially if you’re writing a series) or if the protagonist will find closure before your narrative’s conclusion.

Whether there is healing still to be done or your protagonist and their romantic interest have found closure, you can demonstrate this without relying heavily on prose.

You might:

• Provide space for a meaningful conversation that leads to closure or reunion
• Have the protagonist or their romantic interest provide a symbolic gesture (think: helping Jamie to fulfill her list in Nicholas Sparks’ A Walk to Remember).
• Utilize silent, simple moments of understanding

Stories of falling out of love can be just as transformative to your protagonist’s journey as romantic endings. 

The emotional turmoil and revelations that breakups provide allow space for writers to develop complex character arcs where relationships hold great influence over how your protagonists evolve.

Dabble with the relationship arc that supports your character’s journey.

Whichever ending you choose, use the questions in this post to help you craft a breakup that demonstrates heartbreak and healing authentically, rather than playing into the melodrama of inner and outer conflict clashing.

Play it out multiple ways until you land on the strongest “aha” moment for your protagonist.

Have you written a breakup in your stories?

Share your tips for writing realistic romantic breakups.

Check out this blog post for 9 Ways to Set Up Fictional Break Ups if you’re at a loss for how to start.

Talk soon!

Julia